“F”–“For the wages of sin…”

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“For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.” –Romans 6:23

Wages–a payment, recompense, or reward. We usually think of a reward as something desirable or good, but in the context of this verse, the term is more synonymous with recompense, which has to do with paying a debt. This verse is my earliest recollection of learning the word, wages, and so for many years I only associated the term with paying for something I’d done wrong. The first clause in this verse is about as straightforward as can be; thankfully, it doesn’t end there. It really just states the reason why the second half is so critical–we’d have no hope were it not for the “gift of God” mentioned in part B.

A few chapters prior to this one in Romans (3:23), Paul wrote, “For all have sinned and come short of the glory of God.” This verse sets the stage for what Paul says here regarding the wages of sin. None of us are exempt from this consequence, and this is what makes our faith so relevant to everyone, though not everyone is willing to acknowledge the existence of sin or God or both. The premise that we are all sinful is blatantly obvious; just look anywhere in history and in current events, and most conspicuously, in our own hearts. We all are flawed; even the “best” person we know sins. 

So what about part B? What can we do about our dismal fate? WE can’t do anything ourselves, but God in His love for us provided a way out–a means of salvation. He gave His only Son to pay those wages we can’t pay. Jesus is the only one Who could pay this debt because He is sinless. Paul wrote in 2 Corinthians 5:21(NLT), “For God made Christ, who never sinned, to be the offering for our sin, so that we could be made right with God through Christ.” The challenging part for many of us is the concept that it’s a gift; the only way to salvation is accepting that gift. I pray even before you are born, little one, that you will accept this gift in your younger years, when childlike faith can open your heart to the most precious gift you will ever receive. 

“E” is for “Even a child…”

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“Even a child is known by his doings, whether his work be pure, and whether it be right.” –Proverbs 20:11

I remember learning this verse when I was very little; I particularly recall thinking the term “doings” was a funny word. Again, I didn’t have any problem accepting the truth of these verses in the ABC book when I was young. I understood that I was supposed to behave, and people would know I knew Jesus because of how I acted–this was another truth that I believe helped shape my childlike faith and establish its foundation in the Word of God.

This verse reminds me of other verses that allude to our bearing fruit if we are abiding in Christ. John 15:4 states, “Remain in me, and I in you. Just as a branch is unable to produce fruit by itself unless it remains on the vine, neither can you unless you remain in me.” In other words, adults, too, are known by their “doings.” I have struggled at times with what “remaining” in Him looks like, but in reality, when I revisit the simple origins of my faith, it is clear that I just have to take Him at His word. He says to read His Word and pray–sounds simple enough. Of course, life presents a thousand ways of distracting from this all-important focus.

Just prior to this verse in John, Jesus said, “Every branch in me that does not produce fruit he removes, and he prunes every branch that produces fruit so that it will produce more fruit.” Pruning has never been a desirable experience for me; He allows this often painful ordeal in order to bring about an ultimately valuable result. None of us like painful experiences, but they are a fact of life. I cling to the credence that there is a purpose for it all, regardless of whether I get to see the outcome or not.

I have gardened most of my adult life, and therefore, have pruned many types of plants, shrubs, and trees. Sometimes I didn’t know what on earth I was doing, but I typically learned from my mistakes, though sometimes the plants didn’t survive my ignorance. Thankfully, I know I can trust that when God does His pruning, He knows what He is doing and has a plan for my good (Jeremiah 29:11). He doesn’t waste any of the pain He’s allowed in my life, and though I’ve struggled through so many times of pruning and may not get to see the ultimate results, I still believe He is good. Life would be a dismal prospect indeed without the foundation of His goodness.

Psalm 30:5b says, “Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning.” I love this verse; it reminds me that not only is He with me through the hard times, but He will also restore me when the time is right. This is a lifelong learning curve; sometimes in the midst of the “weeping,” I’ve had to give the pain back to Him as often as every five minutes. From the physical pain of an abscessed tooth to the emotional pain of losing someone I thought I couldn’t live without and every type of “pruning” in between, God is faithful. I take comfort in 1 Corinthians 10:13 as well: “But God keeps his promise, and he will not allow you to be tested beyond your power to remain firm; at the time you are put to the test, he will give you the strength to endure it, and so provide you with a way out.” I pray, little one, that you, too, will know God’s goodness from a young age and unwaveringly trust in Him.

“D” is for “Draw near…”

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“Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you.” –James 4:8

This verse seemed so attainable to me as a child; I remember having such a simple faith that allowed me to just accept that I could pray anytime, anywhere, and He would hear me. I had no doubt that I had His complete and unwavering attention. As I got older, though, and life began to reveal its undesirable potential, I often found myself drawing closer to other things–not to my loving, sovereign God.

Several years ago when I was studying to become a teacher, I remember being introduced to a graphic organizer for learning about analogies, and one of the concepts for students to consider about an idea was “what it is not.” In other words, exploring the concepts that may seem to correspond with the chosen idea, but in reality are anything from a close misconception to a complete opposite of the desired concept. I have since pondered applying this idea of “what it is not” to walking by faith. If I’m not drawing near to God, then I’m drawing near to something He is not–either something I don’t perceive as bad and often unintentionally replacing Him in my life, or something completely wrong that is counterproductive to everything He wants for me in my life. 

This idea also corresponds with being grateful–when I focus on what I have and the many blessings I have enjoyed and continue to enjoy and look forward to enjoying, I experience a peace and contentment that is not common in this life, though it is always there if I just choose it. When I focus on what is not there, i.e. what I don’t have and continually long for, I am miserable and prone to live in a perpetual state of dissatisfaction. It seems a basic concept, yet I’ve struggled with keeping the priorities of my focus in order! My challenge to you, my sweet blessing of a grandchild, is to cling to your childlike faith throughout life. Be encouraged that we all struggle, yet God is always near, whether we “feel” it or not.

Now for a real-life example: I pray every week for guidance in what to write to you, and this morning prior to the church service, there was the usual scrolling of pictures on the screens while people were getting seated. One of those pictures was of a group of preschoolers in a classroom, some of them with their arms raised and all with smiles on their faces. I immediately was transported back about ten years to a time when I was helping out in a nursery at a church I’d attended for many years. A little boy about three years old was chatting up a storm in the next room over, and his voice sounded so much like my little boy had sounded at that age that I suddenly found myself overwhelmed, and unwelcomed hot tears streamed down my cheeks. I withdrew to the restroom to pull myself together because I didn’t want people to know how much I had yearned for more babies, to experience family in all of its wonderfulness. I’d struggled so long to accept that this long-held desire was apparently not God’s plan for me. It was easy to traipse down this road toward self-pity and wallow in my pain. 

But God (there’s that phrase again…) had given me this incredible son to raise, and though I couldn’t always see it at the time, raising him brought me such contentment and fulfillment in my life that I didn’t always appreciate my situation as much as I wish I had back then. Looking back now, I can see the blessing he was to me, and God knew what He was doing. God always knows what He is doing. I constantly try to get back to that place of childlike faith and draw near to God–letting go of how I think things should be and accepting how He has orchestrated them. It’s a journey; I am grateful that He has brought me through that vulnerability to a stability that only He can give. That is only one of the many long-term shifts in perspective through which He has guided me; I hope to share many more with you in the months and years to come. 

“B” is for “But God…”

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“But he was wounded for our transgressions…” Isaiah 53:5

“B” could stand for many things; I opted to go with “But God” because regardless of the BURDEN I carry, the BITTERNESS with which I struggle, or the BROKENNESS that afflicts me daily, the BATTLE is the Lord’s. He is sovereign over all of the circumstances in my life; the greatest burden is that of sin. The picture next to the verse in the “ABC” book shows the child kneeling at the cross and his burden falling from his back. One of the first things I need to remember is that He loves me with an unfathomable love that led Him to pay the price for all of my burdens, my transgressions–my sins. This verse actually comes before the “A” verse that stated we all have gone astray–we all have sinned. 

Sin manifests a wide variety of consequences, bitterness being one of them. I have temporarily lost battles with bitterness, but God has always provided victory overall. Without going into detail, I would say my most difficult struggles with bitterness involve the failure of my life to go the way I’d always imagined. I’d tried being “good” when I was young, naively believing that my expectations for life would work out how I’d planned because I “did the right thing.” Some people preach that you can obtain whatever you go after if you just apply yourself–that may work out in some cases when it aligns with God’s purpose, but our goals sometimes don’t, and we may seek after selfish pursuits. Sometimes, it’s the actions of others that result in bitter effects for ourselves as well. In any case, Ephesians 4:31 admonishes us to “get rid of all bitterness, rage, and anger.” This is a task that requires more than our own strength; even in gaining victory over bitterness, there’s usually unavoidable brokenness left in its wake.

Proverbs 17:22 states, “A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit saps a person’s strength.” Brokenness is an unavoidable result of sin. Again, even if we attempt to walk the straight and narrow, we all fall down, and the sins of others will also inevitably affect us. Unfortunately, the people who are closest to us are the ones with the power to inflict the deepest wounds that can cause us to be broken and even succumb to bitterness. But God Who works all things together for our good (Romans 8:28)–not just good things–uses the broken pieces of our lives for a much greater purpose. The pain and the sorrow of this world drains us, as the verse says, but it also begins with the beneficial advantage of a cheerful heart. What is the key to a cheerful heart? I’d have to say gratefulness–shifting the focus from what is wrong or missing to what is good and in place. This is a conscious act, a choice I must make. Proverbs 15:15 provides this encouragement: “All the days of the oppressed are wretched, but the cheerful heart has a continual feast.”

The bottom line is this: yes, there will always be struggles in this world, but God knows what He’s doing. He’s never surprised by the circumstances in our lives; His plan is more vast than anything we can comprehend. We can trust Him. One of my favorite verses is John 16:33 when Jesus said, “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” I still wrestle with putting the trials of this life in their proper perspective, and probably will for all my days. It’s human nature to try to handle it ourselves, but God has already made a way. Even when the people we love hurt us or fail us or let us down in some way, God is the only One to fill that void and mend that broken place. He loved us so much that He took our burdens, our bitterness, our brokenness, and our battles upon Himself. We have only to choose to accept Him.

“A” is for All

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“All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way.” Isaiah 53:6

We have all wandered like sheep; I understand this clause better today than as a youngster because as an adult I have raised sheep for nearly a decade and witnessed how downright stupid these animals can be. I have been frustrated by some–having spent hours chasing escapees all over the mountainside only to find them eventually back at the fence waiting to enter the pasture. I have been heartbroken by others–-holding a sickly newborn in my arms as it took its last breath. And so much in between…I can understand why we are compared to these animals–the frustration we must cause our Creator, but He still gently holds us in His arms with the tender love of the good Father that He is.

I remember reading the second clause of this verse as “We have turned every one to his own way,” as opposed to, “We have each turned to his own way.” I thought that we were responsible for turning others away from the desired path, which was still a wrong thing to do, but I later realized that the phrasing was intended to emphasize the initial word “all” at the beginning of the verse. 

All of us are in the same sinking boat; each one of us has tried to follow his own destructive path. Of course, the message would be a sad one if it ended there. The surrounding verses expound on Christ’s sacrifice to save us all from our own destructive ends. This verse establishes the basic concept of understanding that we are all lost without Him–the foundation of my faith and appropriately the first in the ABC Memory Book.

Hidden in my heart

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When I was very young, I participated in a program under BMA (Bible Memory Association) that focused on memorizing a verse each week from a publication they had released. The verses were in alphabetical order based on the first letter of each verse, with a few exceptions for some of the more obscure letters like “X” and “Z.” I was unable to find an original copy of the book, but I found one similar from another publisher that is almost identical. With the approach of the birth of my first grandchild (in roughly 26 weeks), I want to revisit a verse in this book each week and share something I’ve learned or clung to, having “hidden” each of these verses in my young heart so many years ago. My hope is to convey something personal and meaningful to her and perhaps share in establishing the same rock solid foundation for her that I was blessed to have in my youth.

I always remembered the picture of the lamb included with the first verse in the book, but I’d forgotten the tear rolling down its cheek. The lamb had wandered off and was lost, and that was why it was sad. Even in my young mind I knew that being lost was a terrible place to be. One of my earliest memories–I was about three years old–involved being dropped off at the house of my babysitter when my mother was helping out in the lunchroom at my brother’s school. I had been dropped off many times, apparently without incident, but the time I recall was when I tried to open the door and it was locked. I banged my little fists on the door and cried and cried, but no one came for what seemed like hours to me. I remember turning back toward the road, looking for someone to help, but no one came. Someone finally opened the door of the house and brought me in, but I don’t remember that at all–only the traumatic experience of being locked out and alone. 

I never wanted my child to experience that terror that I remembered. Though I didn’t consciously think about it, I always had a built-in sense that I needed to physically see my son safely inside any place I took him; he never had to knock and wait for admittance at daycare or school or wherever. Looking back, I believe it’s because of my own experience and consequent determination that no one, particularly my child, should ever have to feel so afraid, especially at such a young age. I believe the lessons we keep from our youth impact us throughout our lives; I will endeavor to explore some of the important ones from my experience in the weeks ahead.

My Own Understanding

by BetsyFaith, LifePosted on 3 Comments

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths. –Proverbs 3:5-6

I’ve known these verses practically since I could talk; unfortunately, sometimes when things become too commonplace in my mind, I tend to overlook the most conspicuous concepts. I have often become hung up on the “trust in the Lord” part, focusing on what that looks like in my day-to-day life. I can’t always articulate what I need to do in those times when “trust in the Lord” comes to my mind. What am I to do? Or, what am I not to do? I’ve often returned to the concept that I cannot mess up God’s plan, no matter what I choose in a challenging situation. He uses everything to work together in a most intricately brilliant fashion to bring about the necessary results.

I’ve come to the point of looking beyond the first clause of the sentence to decipher what trusting with all my heart might look like. A theme with which I’ve been wrestling this year is “lean not on your own understanding.” I have no trouble identifying what that looks like in my life; it’s only natural that as human beings, we tend to use prior knowledge and experience to make decisions and form hypotheses of sorts. I rely heavily on my own understanding–but here it clearly guides me not to lean on it. When I link this clause with the previous one, it becomes much clearer that a vital pillar in the structure of trusting the Lord is not to give ultimate credence to what I think I know or can predict or assume to be true or expected. That’s not a simple task, and like so many others, I anticipate I’ll be continuously learning to lean elsewhere for my understanding–on the only reliable source.

When I don’t know what to think or believe or choose, and I discount my own understanding, I sit in that abysmal place of indecision and pray for direction. When I don’t have a concrete plan in place and no viable option seems to stand out among the rest, what can I do? I can finish reading the verse, for starters: “In all your ways acknowledge Him…” What does that mean in the context of the situation at hand? I find peace in acknowledging His sovereignty; He has always come through, sometimes in the most unexpected ways. My encouragement for the new year is this: 1. Hide His Word in my heart. 2. Don’t overvalue my own understanding. 3. Find peace in His sovereignty.

The Secret Chord

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The origins of the word lyric trace back to poetry that was to be sung with a lyre. As a lover of words, I have long been intrigued by well-crafted lines of poetry and song lyrics written in everything from biblical Psalms to rock anthems of the 20th century. The song “Hallelujah” that hails from the 1980’s transports me on a philosophical pilgrimage that can result in a different destination every time I hear it. I’ve often pondered the line about  “A secret chord that David played and it pleased the Lord.” What chord was it, and could I learn how to play it?

Life is littered with misconceptions–I’ve often misunderstood something as simple as a lyrical line in a song and later discovered the actual words and a completely different meaning than I’d originally thought. For example, for years I thought another line in “Hallelujah” was “the barefoot king composing ‘Hallelujah.’” It made sense to me because it’s referencing the psalmist David who’d spent years as a shepherd, and I’d imagined he must’ve been barefoot much of the time. When I later learned that he was “the baffled king composing,” I embarked on another pilgrimage of thought–I could identify with so many of David’s psalms, and it made sense that he was often baffled, not just by life itself, but also by the overwhelming concept that the God of the universe cares for us (Psalm 8).

I had the misconception for the longest time that my purpose in life was linked to the idea that I could do something in my own power that was worth God’s approval–that I could play a chord that would please Him, so to speak. It didn’t occur to me that He was at work doing something much more in-depth than I could ever imagine. He is actually more interested in me–to mold me into what He wants me to be in my relationship with Him–not so that I can do something for Him. It’s still baffling to me–seeing myself as important to God, as one that He loves regardless of my capacity to please Him. Ironically, being baffled helps me to understand David’s perspective in the Psalms as well as appreciate the beauty of the lines he wrote.

When the right hand is left out…

by BetsyFaith, LifePosted on No Comments

I’ve been spending quite a bit of time shooting hoops lately in order to break up the utter monotony of my solitary work days. I have always had an unconventional way of shooting, but it works for me—I have a two-handed shot. Most people use one hand to propel the ball and the other to guide it, but no, not me.

I sincerely missed my right hand and its reliability!

My unique shooting style was not by conscious choice. During the summer before my freshman year in high school, I was in a car accident wherein one of my injuries was a broken right elbow. Since I am right-handed, I started high school trying to develop some ambidextrous skills.

Though my handwriting left much to be desired, it actually improved over time (this was long before computers or even word processors—okay, I’ve lost most of the modern world on that one…). Since my friends and I were very much obsessed with basketball, I often hung around while they played, and I practiced spinning the ball using my left hand. Again, this skill began to improve over time, but I sincerely missed my right hand and its reliability!

…it would never be the same.

Eventually, after two surgeries and weeks of physical therapy, I was able to use my right arm again—but it would never be the same. The effects of not using that arm had caused the muscles to atrophy, and though I regained strength over time, I had resorted to relying on my left arm to compensate on so many levels. I discovered that I could actually spin the basketball really easily with my right hand, though I had never done it before that point. Using my left hand immediately seemed foreign and awkward when it came to spinning the ball, though I had been practicing with it for weeks.

…a teammate tried to convince me to alter my shot…

On the other hand (pun intended?) when it came to shooting, I found that I lacked the strength to propel the ball to the hoop with my now inferior right arm, so I shifted my entire approach to split the aim and the strength between both of my arms. I didn’t even realize I was doing it. I gained accuracy, however, and I played basketball that way all through high school. When I went to college, a teammate tried to convince me to alter my shot, and I gave it a try, but it was an utter failure. Four years was more than enough to establish the habit, and even if I didn’t look like the other girls when I shot, I was much more accurate with my own way of shooting.

Events and choices affect us often for years after the fact. Some adults in my life told me years later that I was a much more serious teenager after experiencing the ordeal of that car accident. Though I am sure their observations were correct on some level, I didn’t focus on the accident or see myself that way—I remember enjoying the challenge of spinning that basketball on my left hand and seeing how well I could sign my name with my left hand and playing seasons of basketball with my lifelong friends, and shooting the ball with both hands. 

It’s always a choice of what we take away from an experience…

It’s always a choice of what we take away from an experience; that ordeal shaped part of who I am today. I had begun to learn the lifelong lesson of trusting God with my weaknesses since what I’d relied on for strength was taken away. Psalm 46:1-3 says, “God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging.” After this ordeal, I learned to appreciate my physical strength when it returned though I had begun to understand that God’s strength is what I needed–He never leaves me, no matter the problem or storm. 

Expiration dates

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When “normal” gets flipped on edge and then flipped again, it’s difficult to tell which way is up.

The concept of normal has been rewritten for all of us–it is nearly unheard of that we can all share the same event, especially at the same time. Though our individual experiences will vary, we are going through this disruption of “normal” together. Such common scenes on television as people enjoying a meal in a crowded restaurant or a packed audience on an awards show have begun to look strange and even unacceptable. When “normal” gets flipped on edge and then flipped again, it’s difficult to tell which way is up.

God wasn’t blindsided by this.

On March 3rd, a tornado ravaged the area where I live and decimated the school where I work. We praise God for the fact that it occurred at night and not during the school day. Although this colossal event wreaked enough havoc in itself, there was always hope–God wasn’t blindsided by this. He had already been working in peoples’ lives in the midst and all around the effects of this ordeal. People from all walks of life had stepped up to volunteer their time and resources to make what needed to happen take place. Several venues were lined up for us to resume school after the break, but then, plans had to be changed again with the attempts to quarantine the virus. Teacher training was then altered to include groups smaller than ten. And now, everyone is working from home, teaching and troubleshooting tech issues via text and email and occasional video conference. 

Waves of hopelessness and disappointment have nearly drowned me in the past.

Spending my days alone in a room day after day, I find that I have to be on constant defense against all of the negative thoughts that can creep in if I allow them. Waves of hopelessness and disappointment have nearly drowned me in the past. Looking at the impact on both the lives of individuals and the global economy, it’s hard to even imagine what the world will look like when the dust settles. In my old normal, I could usually focus on the goal or the end of the ordeal. When there is no concrete date of conclusion and uncertainty rules, it’s rather overwhelming to keep facing each day. 

“When the earth and all its people quake, it is I who hold its pillars firm.”

In Ephesians 6:14, we are charged to “Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place.” So what truths do I cling to? In Psalm 75:3, the Lord says, “When the earth and all its people quake, it is I who hold its pillars firm.” Do I trust that He is in control? Or was my trust in the familiarity of “normal” that had lulled me into complacency? The whole earth is quaking; nothing is going to be as it was before. Yet, I have a peace that lives in the realm of the unexplained. Philippians 4:7 says, “And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” I have to go to Him for that peace multiple times a day, and He always obliges. 

I’ve never wanted sour milk so badly in my life. 

Occasionally in the past, I had taken note of grocery expiration dates in relation to looking forward to an event, like “that will be close to Christmas” or “spring will be here by then.” I went to the grocery store about ten days ago, and I found myself evaluating the expiration dates on the milk, wondering if this would all be over by the time the milk soured. I’ve never wanted sour milk so badly in my life.